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Daily Thoughts

Why You Don’t Find Yourself, You Need To Create Yourself

After I left college, I had a bunch of options in front of me to pick for my next move — join the corporate world, continue my education or (like many of my friends and classmates) go travelling to “find myself”.

Now I’ve never been comfortable with the term ‘find myself’.

What the hell does that actually mean?

Who I am at 19 is not necessarily the same person I’ll be at 30, I can actually tell you for a fact now, this is true. Finding myself at 19 would have meant that I loved video games, eating junk food, creating random small businesses and clinging to toxic relationships — my values were pretty weak and more centred around what my hair looked like and if people liked me. 

Whereas through everyday life experiences and age with more forms of wisdom and random curve balls, I’ve been able to discover more about myself.

I read a great quote from Tim Ferriss that went:

“You don’t find yourself, you create yourself”. 

Tim Ferriss

I couldn’t agree more with this as that’s precisely what happens over the course of our lives.

We learn through experiences and continue to evolve.

The ten thousand dollar Instagram beach snap

I’ve seen lots of friends & family who like myself have struggled with identity and have used various methods to try and find out “who they are”.

The most popular one that most of us have no doubt been in contact with is travelling areas of the world and burning through our finances in doing this to find “ourselves” and then return to our actual life to use that realisation to go forth and conquer. 

The problem is I’ve very rarely seen anyone come back from their travels with any other learning than they became good at burning money and taking a billion-holiday snaps for Instagram.

Now I’m not saying that you shouldn’t travel the world to experience different cultures, connect with new people and have an amazing time. I’ve toured Europe, America and Asia too. I experienced some beautiful moments and gained a new perspective.

But don’t pin your hopes on backpacking for 6 months and expecting to figure it all out and become an oracle — sadly life doesn’t work that way.

Personally, my path was different from those around me.

I poured myself into literature, podcasts, and videos and embraced new people from different cultures to understand new ways of thinking and gain new experiences.

The caveat for me is that I didn’t have to travel the world for 6 months and burn through multiple credit cards to live on a beach or in a sacred cave to chase enlightenment. I made the time to continually invest in myself.

Below is a quote I always ponder in relation to the who I am conundrum. Perhaps it will help you too.

“True happiness beats in your chest. Work out what you like to do best and try to do more of that. Don’t torture yourself pondering the purpose of life. It’s here, it’s now and it won’t last forever, so enjoy it.”

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Deep Thoughts

Conquer your inner bitch

I shouldn’t have worked out today, said no one ever

You know those days when you get home, you feel tired, it’s been a bit of a rough day and your couch along with that tub of Ben and Jerry’s looks ever so appealing – those are the days you need to be moving your ass and getting your workout done.

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Daily Thoughts

Our life is what our thoughts make of it

Have you ever heard the phrases ‘negativity breeds negativity’and ‘calm is contagious’?

Both of these phrases come from the dwellings of your thoughts and your perception of the life you’re living. What you allow into your headspace will be a big factor on how you think and feel.

Thoughts are very powerful, they can hurt and heal us. Working to maintain a good flow of thoughts is no easy task, but it can be accomplished by looking at the external sources of information and influence that you allow in.

We all have a different outlook as to what life is. Your life is made up of the thoughts that you have swirling around in your head. So think about what your thoughts look like? Are you thinking on a happy wavelength or are you clouding your mind with negativity?.

Just remember that the power lies in you, we have the control over our own thoughts and you can change these at anytime and your view on the world around you.

Before you go…

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Daily Thoughts

Insightful books for the curious mind

Super quick post on 3 books that have shaped my thinking over the last 12 months, they’ve helped me look at life from different perspectives and who knows, maybe they can help you too.

Categories
Deep Thoughts

Muhammad Ali & the power of self belief

 

He who is not courageous enough to take risks, will accomplish nothing in life

People will say many things about Ali, but one thing that cannot be denied is his profound influence upon our society and staying true to himself. He was never just an athlete, he transcended his sporting background and much like Bruce Lee before him, he flowed out into many parts of our culture.

In the mountains of amazing things that Ali had done, the one thing that I learnt from him and still resonates with me to this day and will do for the rest of my life is the art of self-belief.

If you want to achieve it, you got to believe it

It always seemed that Ali had no fear, he was cocky, he was brash and was a master if not a grandmaster in mental warfare and all of this stemmed from his unwavering self-belief. Not for a second, would he consider that he was beatable, he never worried about what his opponent was doing and only focused on what he had to do to get the job done.


He’s a proven example that believing in yourself can take you to amazing heights and hit the potential you know you have, despite what the critics say. Even recently there has been another great example of self-believe from the sporting arena, with another prizefighter becoming a world champion after 10 years grinding. Those who follow the UFC, will know I refer to the newly crowned middleweight champion Michael Bisping, who despite all the detractors and fighting at only 2 weeks notice, pulled out the biggest win and one of the most amazing upsets in the sports history. When interviewed after the fight and asked what kept him going after 10yrs, he responded “I always believed, I always knew I would be a world champion”.

If my mind can conceive it and my heart can believe it – then I can achieve it

You can call this the Ali effect, but the amazing powers of ones mentality in the pursuit of accomplishing their dreams cannot be denied. Ali had this in abundance and has left the world with many lessons on how to be great, but also to do it your way.

If you think about it, he was a philosopher without even knowing it, his quotes are infamous and like Bruce Lee’s famous excepts they will be used to inspire for generations to come.

A man who views the world the same at 50 as he did at 20 has wasted wasted 30 years of his life

Although the world has lost a great character and innovator, we should reflect on what he taught us and make sure we use those learnings to make our own lives amazing. He will always be the greatest and he showed us all, how great we can be too.

Before you go…

If you like my writing and think “Hey, I’d like to hear more of what this guy has to say” then you’re in luck.

You can subscribe to my weekly “Steal these thoughts” newsletter here.

Every week I share a dose of my own writing and interesting content that has caught my eye, it’s free, no spam, unsubscribe whenever you want.

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