You are not defined by your parents blueprint

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A quick note before we begin:

This is a topic I’ve wanted to write about for sometime, it’s actually been in the works for nearly 8 months.

I’ve always been fascinated by human behaviour and exploring why we do the things we do. As a society, mental health issues have been on a scary increase over the last 10-15 years and particularly in my generation, the anointed ‘millennials’.

I’m a believer in the fact that all of us in some way are dealing with the mechanics of a path and way of engaging with the world that we did not choose when we were infants, being most likely thrust upon us by those who raised us. As I’ve grown older, it’s become pretty clear to me that many of us struggle daily, because some of the things we have been taught in the environment from our younger years don’t actually help us live a good life now.

This post is not me telling you what to do, rather it’s a bunch of thoughts and insights that I feel can help you find some understanding in why you operate the way you do, whether that’s in how you think, feel or behave. It’s ultimately about recognising that you have a choice in everything in life and we have the power to change anything.

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Facilitate not command and control

A common theme I find in my work of delivering large scale learning programmes and when I’ve delivered projects too, has been understanding the multiple elements to your role in the grand scheme of things.

I’ve come to appreciate that a large part of my role is to facilitate collaboration, creativity and delivery of the work. What it is not to do and it’s actually something that I’ve seen too many people do, is to command and control everything.

For a programme and project manager this is detrimental not only to the success of your project or programme, yet also to the engagement and respect you get from the people around you.

I like to apply this same principle in other areas of life too. I look to facilitate and be adept to change, not trying to control everything and command everyone to what I want/need.

I don’t believe you’ll find much success in work or life if you take an approach of control and command. Of course in some cases when the chips are down and people need leadership, you may need to take control of something to bring it back on course.

What is not necessary, is to look to command and control every little thing.


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The dangers of not moving forward and being true to yourself

I’ve had several conversations of late around change, the effect it can have on one’s life and why it’s an evolutionary necessity to reach your potential.

Many of these conversations have focused around the fear of change, the uncertainty it brings and the opportunity for failure or embarrassment if it all goes wrong.

It made me think about what embracing change, moving forward and why respecting this is part of life is so important in reaching new levels. You see if we always resist change, not only do we deny ourselves the opportunity to explore what could be, we also stop being true to ourselves.

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